Hi, I’m Angel.
Until 2016, I spent the majority of my life using mind-altering substances to help cope with the ups and downs of my life. Drinking and drugging was my way of dealing with everything from sadness to victory, with very little consequences.
I raised children, maintained steady employment, and had a fairly active social life. On the outside, I was for the most part a “functioning addict”.
The signs were definitely glaringly obvious to me that I had a problem. Once I became too wrapped up in one addiction, I would switch gears to another substance or behavior. I am a shining example of the addict who’s drug use is only a symptom of my disease.
The Downward Spiral
On Christmas night in 2010, my husband died of a morphine overdose, which triggered my downward spiral into the depths of my addiction.
My prescription opioid addiction eventually turned me into a person I no longer recognized and took everything from me, short of my life.
I became a liar and a thief, and basically learned to live a double life. I lost jobs, cars, a house, relationships, friends, my reputation and my dignity. I lived in a shroud of shame and guilt, which only added to my sickness.
By the end of 2015, I really didn’t care if I lived or died. My disease had convinced me that I would never be anything more than who I was in that moment, and I didn’t deserve anything better.
I had created chaos in the lives of my children, destroyed trust of some of my dearest friends, and woke up every day wondering why God allowed me to live.
The Power To Change
In 2016, with the help of someone that showed me unconditional love, I made a choice to do something different. I entered an outpatient treatment program and made a commitment to living my life differently.
Since then, I’ve had to deal with the consequences of my actions during addiction, and begin to build a new life.
It was difficult at first, because I had to admit that I was powerless over this disease. I also had to commit to being open and honest, which is something that I hadn’t done in a long time. I knew without total honesty, I would never change. Hiding my disease would only put me in the ground, and I don’t want to die.
In 2017, I started to see some of the progress I’ve made. I started my own online business coaching entrepreneurs, I cut a few toxic people out of my life that had triggered my use in the past, and I began facing the mental health issues that played a part in my addiction.
I’m definitely still a work in progress, but today I am proud of how far I have come.
Life of an Addict
I created Life of an Addict as a new place for addicts and their loved ones to find hope, strength and the power to change.
I have lost friends and family to overdoses, and all around me I see other people going through the same loss. This disease has no prejudice. I have watched it destroy the lives of people who have never done drugs in their life, yet they are burying their children because of this disease.
As this website grows, I hope to become involved in ending this horrible epidemic that is killing so many of our loved ones.
I invite you to join me on this journey. Whether you are an addict in active addiction, an addict in recovery, someone who has been affected by someone else’s addiction, or just here to learn more about the disease of addiction, Life of an Addict has something to offer that will keep you coming back for more.
For the first time in my life, I’m excited about the future, and I want to spread this joy to the addicts who are still suffering.
We all have a purpose in this life, and I want to help you find yours. If you’re still in active addiction, I encourage you to take a step right now and reach out for help.
Every addict I’ve ever met is highly creative and the possesses the ability to feel emotions on a very deep level. That is a gift, even though it sometimes feels like a curse and leads us to use. Isolation and self-destruction do not have to be your destiny.
If you have a story about addiction or life in recovery, I’d love to share it. Your anonymity will be respected if you prefer not to be credited for your submission. Visit my Guest Post page now to submit your post idea.
If you have ideas that would make this website better or more useful for helping addicts, please let me know! I am open to your feedback. In fact, I encourage it.
Remember, unconditional love is more powerful than you can even imagine. Start with loving yourself.